Did you remember seeing in the 1984 Olympics in Cherry-evo the cherry pit spitting competitions? They were awesome. But it comes to us now that some competitors may have had an untold advantage and it wasn’t steroids.
We found out this week. Our cherry tree is loaded with cherries- our biggest crop ever. We had a pit spit off. Kyle, who is strong as an ox and fit as Arnold, though warmed up, his tongue posed a problem pertaining particularly to pit power. He can’t curl his tongue! It’s genetic. Luke and I can and therefore reigned.
Perhaps at the next Olympics they should have two groups: those who can curl and those who can’t. If you’ve every watched “curling” in the Olympics with the guys sweeping the ice to propel their stone to the goal you may find tongue curling and pit spitting even more hair raising, edge of your seat exciting. Be there. Next event is Pitts-burg then it’s 2008 Bing-jing Olympics or Bust!
That’s amazing and one wonders if the ability to curl your tongue might be considered an unfair advantage! On the other hand there’s nothing wrong with being tall when you play basketball. Back in my home province of Guangdong, er, expectorating, is not merely a sport, it’s a way of life (anyone who has visited an American Chinatown, where my fellow provincials hold sway, will note that men, women, and children expectorate all over the place). Long distance expectorating requires training, but I think Kyle is not averse to hard work - surely there must me some yoga exercises that has to do with the tongue. This combined with a little qigong practice, and you’ll be spitting for the record. The trick for the upcoming Bing Jing Olympics is to use the good old American bred Bing Cherry (invented in Milwaukie, Oregon. circa 1870 by Ah Bing - don’t worry since he was from China, the Chinese Olympic committee won’t squawk!) pits and paying your trainer (me) in Loukamathes. Your only difficulty will be if Luke and Leslie bribe me on the side - with their natural tongue curling abilities they’ll be launching those pits into orbit…
Thank you for your posts Russell! I love them. And I am in no way beyond bribing. I’ll think of something although I don’t know if I could beat the Loukamathes. Excuse me, I need to clean my computer screen. I’ve been practicing.