Once a Yenta…

by Leslie Abbott on May 20, 2008 in General. Comments

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My dad was Jewish and grew up in New York. I wasn’t raised in the religion. I haven’t heard my share of Yiddish expressions either but I have always thought that yenta meant a matchmaker in Yiddish. Actually I probably got that from Fiddler on Roof.

Matchmaker, Matchmaker,
Make me a match,
Find me a find,
catch me a catch
Matchmaker, Matchmaker
Look through your book,
And make me a perfect match

I have called myself a “wannabe yenta.” Anyway, I like to match people up. This has been going on since I was knee high. I’m pretty social; it comes naturally. Not to toot my own horn (*Ba-zuuu-ga!*) but I have had some successes in my day. A good friend is going to get married soon to someone I told her was the one. I’ve had some failures but we won’t talk about them. If I lived in a culture of arranged marriages I might have steady employment and it requires no heavy lifting. (At least none that I know of.)

Well back to calling myself a yenta. The joke is on me because the other day I googled “matchmaker in Yiddish” and it said it is Shadchen, not yenta. I then went on to look up the definition of yenta and it is a talkative, gossipy busybody. Hmm… I embarrassingly must admit that I do fit that definition. For “self-growth” reasons I have been trying not to be such a busybody and gossipy person and I must say I am much less than I used to be. Kyle has taken over that role [Hey, I don't gossip, I just like to hear it.... —Kyle] but now I think it could hurt my “career”. I might lose my touch. Maybe it takes a talkative, gossipy, busybody to make a good matchmaker.

Forget self-growth, who’s looking for a match?

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  • Russell from New York
    Touché! Bravo! Knew I could count on ya.
  • -Kyle, please come up with a better saying than this - Russell

    Will do!

    Gossip is the celebration of good fortune of yourself by bragging about the bad fortune of others.
  • toni
    Matchmakers are such fun, and a necessity for someone with no chutzpah like myself. But the one's I know go for practical matches that tend to be tall (from side to side), or Geico cavemanish ... A future as an old maid is getting more and more appealing. :-)
  • Carol
    I need one (is that true?) :)
  • Russell from New York
    Hi Leslie - Interestingly enough, in old China, some matchmakers did do heavy lifting. It was customary for brides to arrive at the groom's home on the wedding day in a sedan chair, but in some remote villages where none was available, the matchmaker him or herself would carry the bride on his or her back. While it would be nice to think that carrying a bride to her new home was sort of a luxury type thing, the ancient practice of footbinding for women made it rather a necessity. On a cheerier note, matchmaking was no doubt a highly profitable business - hence the famous Chinese classical text: "Matchmaking for Fun and Profit". Now, as to the word "Yenta", I can't remember what the original meaning is, but I am reminded of another word- Mensch. It is usually used in an unflattering way to describe a sort of clinging, talkative person, however, I recently read, if I remember correctly, that it actually means - human. It is after all human to communicate, so a Yenta or a busybody could very well be interpreted as a profound humanist as well. It is in the interest of mankind that we learn about and are concerned for our fellow beings (hey Carl, if it's not, let me know...). Gossip, after all, is the something or other of something or other (Kyle, please come up with a better saying than this). Anyhow, even the dubious practice of "pontificating" (which is what I'm doing here) was undoubtedly meant to be a good thing (ask any Pontiff and I'm sure he'll agree). "Laminating" on the other hand has nothing to do with High Lamas, right Carl? Oh, and as for Luke, I don't think "lukewarm" has anything to with you. And finally, as for looking for a match, as you know, I usually use a lighter.
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